Why Do We Do What We Do?

As a Master Life Coach, it is important for me to understand my clients, so I know how to talk and work with them…

We have Core Human Needs, and these are not just wants and desires, these are needs that actually drives our choices in life. We do whatever it takes to fulfill them. Some use the most destructive ways to fulfill these needs, while some find the most positive ways to fulfill them.

My understanding is that every person’s behaviour is driven by what their Top 2 core needs are.

Certainty:

This is the need for security, financial security, job security, secure environment, stable relationships, etc… they are a bit more rigid, they appreciate to do what they know and are comfortable with… you do find more people have this need as their number one.

Variety:

This need is pretty much the opposite of Certainty… this is for those who enjoy different changes, risks, surprises and just not knowing…

In some cases, people that have reached the Certainty and have been there for a while, then they get bored and seek for more Variety.

Significance:

This just reflects the need for being important in some way… for those who appreciate the sense of being needed, sense of meaning, feeling of importance, status, they care about perception of them.

Love/Connection:

Our need to experience feeling loved, intimacy, connected to others, bonding, feeling part of… If this is your highest most important need, you would do whatever it takes to feel the above…

The above mentioned Needs are for the body, we all meet these needs one way or the other, and then we have two more needs, and that for the Soul, for our Spirit, and they are Growth and Contribution.

Growth:

This is the need for growth, expansion, becoming more…. We need to continuously learn, develop emotionally, physically and spiritually.

Contribution:

This is for contributing to humanity.. This is going beyond your own needs, it is about making a difference in other people’s lives, our planet, educating… this is the reason why I have decided to become a coach.

The last two Needs are unfortunately missed by many, and that results in them not being fully content with their lives. I find myself researching more and different ways how I can equip myself more, to help my clients and that also results in personal growth.

Something to ponder on:

How are you meeting your needs? Are you using the more positive and productive ways to meet them? Or are you using the more destructive ways to meet them? What are your 2 most dominating needs? As these are the ones that drives your behavior..

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